Trials, Tribulations and Triumphs of being 3,473 Miles from Upton Park and West Ham United (Aug 2011 - May 2016)
All hail King Sam
I'm sure that's the way he's feeling, Don't Hurt 'Em.
You sure about that HDHE?I'll take the points and smile at it all but I'd still like to see Sam gone in the summer.We're riding our luck and it's a pleasure to see it going our way for a change.Let see if we get Toffee'd next week before we polish up the crown.
hit the jackpot again A.P (BLINDING SAITCH) at the start of the game yesterday and for the first 15mins or 10 mins i thought they were gonna 'Muller' us the way they were playing the ball about,then the goal,,,Adrian San Miguel Del Castillo (translated in English the most apt name for a W H U goalie as Adrian Saint Michael Of The Castle.. let one slip through then Jarvis our speedy Gonzales winger but recently couldnt cross hes eyes ..let alone a ball..slipped through the middle and got upended by their goalie but not before nutmegging him and levelling the score..second half started the same way and ended the same way ....we looked good yesterday...Bobby mustve been smiling up there yesterday being 21yrs since....had a one on one with Andy Carroll outside and gave him a pair of me hammers..he was well pleased ...then the same a bit later with David Sullivan and his lovely Mrs ..ex page 3 and porno lovely Eve Vorley.. so yesterday was a good day all round
P,S Mystic Megadoodah 3-1
I can't speak for Don't Hurt 'Em Smitty, but I wouldn't be surprised if The Brady Bunch are feeling they've weathered the managerial storm. Things are certainly looking much rosier as far at the dreaded drop goes, but according to Alf we're going to need at least 38 points - so seven more to go ?
I'm fairly sure they're smiling and there's a good chance we'll be back to business as usual next year. Can't say I'd be pleased to see it, and I don't think I'm alone in that.I think Cardiff & Fulham will need a miracles so that only leaves one space to fight for.CC looks crackered at the end of most games, AC could easily throw another wobbler, Boriello I don't think will fit hoofn'head so there we are looking at Sam's Plan B again.
As long as it aint us Smitty, I'm not too fussy who makes the drop (especially as Spuds is out of the question). As for Marco B I suspect he was just a "tick the box"/"keep the fans quiet" purchase, to be outed in the summer a la Petrov - a bit cynical view I know.
Yeah, I think we're good. I always did think we'd squeak through somehowI think if we run true to form on the next few and so do all t'others we'll finish 14/15th ishShame about B though, I think he'd be good and play some exciting footieif Alf would ever consider 2 up with a backer from midfield.He seems to have several round oles and square pegs and the Hammer ain't big enough to make em fit, no matter how hard he tries
Not convinced that Alf has even grasped the "square peg round hole" concept Smitty, I think he might be operating strictly on the "must need a bigger mallet" one !
That's patently obvious to all but Alf Mr P, and while he's whacking away I think he's also trying to perfect the water / wine thing he read somewhere.I'll sign up to King Sam if he does it. Next time AC's not there, and CC is crackered, Senori B will look lost on his tod so we can expect to see Woger up front instead. He's a big lad not doing owt. 'Ow about that then lads , that'll surprise em.
You've enlightened me there Smitty. I was wondering why we had Woger - it's like someone picking up a few supplies on the cheap - "big lad like that, bound to come in handy - what's your best price ?" !
Easy, I think I just twigged it, it must be the Plan B we've been waiting for.I bet he's been behind closed doors for weeks practicing.Noble hoofs to Woger, who everyone ignores, nuts it down to Nolan - Bingo!!If he could do that he could write his own ticket anywhere. I'll expect to see it at Citeh last day so Woger can get his own back.
You certainly are our Man On The Scene Slippery, shooting the breeze with AC and then Mr & Mrs Sullivan - is he (DS) friendlier in person ? I've only met Mr Gold and he had something of a happily stoned aura about him - come to think of it I shall call him Happiness Dave !
Son of Psycho (David Cross) was coming down for the game and was being looked after by Phil Parkes in the Legends Barthats why i brought some Hammers to the game as i was gonna pass em on to Psycho's Son Bobby to give to his dad, didnt have a Scooby what he looked like so was banking on seeing Parkesy (got his Hammers the other month) coming out of the ground after the game hoping Bobby Psycho would be with him...missed the pair of em so at about quarter past seven David Sullivan ,his mrs and kids came out (Chinese Communist overcoat in tow) and seeing as seeing as 'Happiness' had been given hammers months ago,i thought id let Lil Dave have a pair....handed em over too him and I, like u ,thought A.P that he seems a bit stand offish but far from it...he asked where i come i told him then his mrs came over from her car saying thanks and that they were impressed cos i make em in me kitchen,,said our goodbyes she got in her car with the kids,he jumped in the red chaffeur driven roller and i walked to the bus stop,as i passed the roller that was in traffic there was a tapping on the window of the motor,looked around and Lil Dave was waving goodbye...im sure that when he asked where i live ..if it was en-route to his essex mansion id have got chaffeured home ,or maybe when i said Custom House he thought to himself "fuck that for a game of soldiers"... P.S. dont know if u know Daughter of Psycho Kate Cross plays for the England cricket team who recently won the womens Ashes test match in Australia
Glad to hear the Our Little One knows how to behave Slippery and I agree a drop off in the Roller may have been a bridge too far, although I imagine it would have given the neighbours something to natter about !
I knew it was a good omen when I turned on the TV Saturday afternoon to watch a DVD and the English Premier League is on live! I can't remember what game since once I knew it wasn't West Ham I turned on the DVD. It was on NBC a major network over here, not some cable channel way up the dial. I just went to the NBC Sports website and they have a Premium League section! I watched a 3 minute recap of the Hammers game. From my understanding it took a Japanese guy making his first goal ever to break the 6 hour scoreless streak. And the odds are a lot better they won't get dropped to the second division. That seems to be a mixed blessing to most of you because you want to get rid of Sam the coach? One of the other stories was about Chelsea losing millions this season. With the dough the Russian Mafia owner pours in to buy good players I presume and they are winning to boot? I'm missing something probably. I'd rather have the Porn Kings as owners since Andy said they saved the team because they are fans.
You're on it Clueless - NBC has got the rights to The Premier League. They show one game on their main channel, but all the other games are on some kind of NBC subsidiary channels (for me on Saturday's channels 122 - 125). Anyway bottom line if The Hammers play Saturday or Sunday you can in theory watch. As for sam (On Saitch only AKA Alf Tupper) the current run of form does make his job look a lot safer - only at West ham can you be on a winning streak and still have something to complain about. As For Chelski their owner probably has more money than either your or I could count !
abramovic is worth in 2013 about $10.2 Billion...it takes about 40yrs counting to 1 Billion if you count 24 hrs a day 7 days a week..so roughly 400-500yrs to count to 10Billion
So Slippery does that mean you could 'alf inch a few Bill and Roman wouldn't notice ?
would love to A.P. dont know how though...i reckon they'd notice anyway probably both 'tight as arsoles'
Now that Putin seems to be reverting back to his glory days in the KGB, maybe he has an old grudge against Chelski for taking all that money out of the country. He could send a poison tipped brolly assassin over and take him out. I think that's your best bet. They don't allow foreigners to own teams over here, let alone Porn Kings. Actually given a choice they probably would let Chelski buy a team before Larry Flynt would be even considered.
I think the whole reason Abramovich bought Chelsea was to avoid the old poison tipped umbrella Clueless. He's now a public figure in Britain - a celebrity football team owner and the British do not take kindly to having their public figures "done in" or disappearing. on Her Majesty's or anyone elses soil. I reckon Chelski means a lot more to Roman than just football !
Back to The Hammers, it would be greedy on top of unrealistic to expect a win at Evrton on Saturday, but is it too much to hope that AC opens his account ? I'd be in favour of starting Carlton and then bringing AC on when he starts to fade and hopefully their defence is at the very least worn down a bit .
I agree he should start CC, bet he won't though.If nobody drops a real clanger we might scrape a draw, but we seem to suck against then home or away every year.Maybe we'll see some top shelf managin, bit of a change of plan to confuse them - Nah!!
Another curveball strategic cunundrum wrapped inside that unpredictable enigma - Alf Tupper ? It's our mob that'll be confused if anything changes Smitty ! A scraped up draw and I'll be well happy !
In Adrian we trust....Adrian's wall 90% trust...Mystic Megadoodah's going for a one nil in our favour.. Enough about SW6 1HS...please C.O.Y.F.I
Well I'm not going to argue with The Mystical One !